Lygeia Ricciardi is the founder & CEO of AdaRose, which makes self-care easy for busy women through a subscription experience that includes mindfulness, body care products, and virtual expert guidance. Lygeia has been at the vanguard of the patient and consumer engagement movement for over a decade as an entrepreneur, consultant, and in the US federal government, where she launched and led nationwide pro-consumer programs and policies.
1) What’s the origin story of AdaRose? Why did you set off to pioneer a company focused on self-care?
I have two answers. There’s a deeper backstory, and then there’s a more immediate contextual story. The deeper backstory is I’ve been in the world of patient engagement and consumer engagement for 20 years. I worked with a lot of patient advocates about how to take charge of every aspect of your health. Within that context, 12 years ago, I had a baby girl whose name is Ada. Middle name, Rose. She was born with a hole in her heart called VSD: ventricular septal defect. Long story short, doctors were saying, “She needs open-heart surgery, and she needs it now. Otherwise, horrible things may happen to her development, or she may not even make it.” But, because I’d been working with all these patient advocates, I did a ton of research, measured a lot of data, spoke to other parents, got a second opinion, all those things. Ultimately, my husband and I decided to avoid open-heart surgery (with support from medical professionals as well).
Now, happily, she is 12 years old and healthy and has never had any surgery. We took a “watch and wait” approach. This was an example in my own life of applying what I learned from patient advocates. I applied the principles I learned from them, like, “Maybe I should ask questions. Maybe I should ask for help. Maybe I should figure this out.” By taking control, you can have some positive outcomes, or at least avoid some negative ones.
That’s the deeper story of owning your health and being engaged in your health. More immediately, though, on the question of self-care specifically, the company was born in 2020 in the context of a global pandemic, and a lot of additional strain layered onto it. I live downtown in Washington, DC. I feel like in the last couple of years we have been in the middle of a hurricane here between social justice issues like the Black Lives Matter movement and March for Our Lives (against gun violence) and seemingly never-ending political clashes. I live a few blocks from the Capitol, and I was here at my desk working on AdaRose stuff on January 6, 2021.
Current events have people stressed out. Mental health is a big challenge. Social media has turned out to be problematic in many ways, especially for girls (of which I have two). And, of course, the pandemic has taken a million lives and damaged many more in this country. I’ve been fortunate that in my family we haven’t had any major losses from COVID directly. But, it’s been a really intense, stressful time. And through it all, as a working mother, I’ve continued to feel a responsibility I’ve felt throughout my life: this massive pressure to hold it together for everybody else across several generations, and that can take a huge toll. If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t do that.
I was figuring out how to manage my own well-being and just manage, period, in these intensely stressful circumstances. That is why I focused on self-care specifically, and taking ownership of your own health. So, ultimately, it started with the question, “What can you, as an individual, do without necessarily having to rely on professionals, the healthcare system, or others to make your quality of health and life better? And how can I harness a combination of technology as well as data and ancient wisdom to help people do that?” I decided to focus on helping other professional women who are also managing and supporting their immediate or extended families.
2) Defining the term “self-care” has recently sparked interesting online conversations about what it is supposed to mean, what it’s not, and how we generally think of it as a practice. What’s your definition?
I believe self-care varies by person. Different people are going to have a different sense of what works for them. I’ve done interviews with 60-plus people to ask them, “What does self-care mean to you?” And responses have been all over the map, although there are some commonalities. For me, self-care is a combination of physical and mental support and investment, whatever is needed to thrive and replenish yourself. In terms of definitions I heard from other people, about 50% see home spa rituals as an element of self-care, that’s their go-to. So that is one starting point for the AdaRose business, which is a subscription service that combines closely correlated online and offline components.
Our first iteration of our monthly service focuses on skincare and meditation, as well as some relaxation exercises, because we wanted to provide an easily accessible combination of physical and mental renewal activities. Soon, however, a subscription service will be available to help people make self-care a habit. It’s not just a thing you do one time. It’s about adopting a mindset of seeking and understanding what you need, which isn’t always easy—and then going out and finding a way to fulfill that need so that you’re as a whole, present, and effective in every aspect of your life as you can be.
We’re currently experimenting with what exactly is going to be in a subscription service. What are the pieces that are always constant, and what varies? There is always going to be a combination of mind care and body care. There’s always going to be an element of learning. But the specifics of each thing are going to. We’re talking to tons of people and trying to understand what they need and what resonates. And then, rather than just say, “Well, the data says the most popular thing would be a new toothbrush,” we’re going to get creative about what we think would help us provide an awesome virtual experience supported by physical objects. When you get an AdaRose box in the mail, we want it to feel like a gift. Something that makes you say, “I enjoy this. This feels good to do.” As opposed to another thing I should do.
Finally, some people are under the impression that self-care has to be a luxurious or expensive thing, which often leaves people out. I think self-care can be as simple as taking a walk in nature and appreciating the beauty of the way the light falls on the leaves, or whatever it is that’s restorative to you. It doesn’t have to equate to a lot of money or something that’s out of reach. With AdaRose, we want to make it easy to integrate self-care into your life without a lot of planning or preparation.
3) In the process of creating your company, what have you discovered are the common obstacles that impede most of us from prioritizing our personal well-being?
Through dozens of customer interviews, the answer to this question became pretty straightforward and clear. There are three common answers.
The first thing is time; time is usually the first thing that people talk about. “It’s hard to find the time. I don’t have time. It is overwhelming to take care of myself. No time.”
The second thing, which people don’t always start with, but is often the reason behind time being viewed as an obstacle, is guilt. I have been focused on talking to working mothers. Many of them feel guilty about not being present with their families if they’re taking care of themselves; whether it’s their child, their partner, or whomever. They also feel like they should be ticking off all the practical errands on their to-do list rather than investing in themselves. They also talk about work guilt, particularly for people who work in teams. They don’t want to let their colleagues down.
The third is planning. Another way I talk about it is mental load. It’s just too overwhelming for people who already feel overstretched and exhausted. They can’t muster the energy to think about how they will take care of themselves on top of everything else. Again, self-care doesn’t have to cost a lot of money; it could be a simple pleasure. But even with simple acts of self-care, it often helps to plan it out to some extent so you have the knowledge, time, and physical props you may need to make the most of it.
4) In addition to becoming an AdaRose subscriber, what are some effective ways someone can move past common obstacles to better prioritize and engage in activities that support their well-being?
To some degree: discipline. Sit down and say, “I am just going to make self-care a priority.” That means building in a structure and accountability. Maybe that means meeting up with a friend, or an agreement with a buddy so that you don’t just skip time for yourself and end up surfing through Netflix instead.
If you can’t seem to get started, begin small. I think a lot of times, almost no matter what the goal is, it’s easy to get discouraged if you think you’re going to take on something massive. I also feel after talking to so many people that prioritizing and feeling okay about self-care—that it isn’t something that you need to feel guilty about—is the biggest step. Give yourself permission to invest in self-care, and be open to exploring new forms.
It’s quite amazing what a little bit of reframing can do, right? And often that’s the only thing you can change, particularly when people say they don’t have time. You can’t make time. There’re only 24 hours in a day. But the reality is, for most of us, our work is a bottomless pit. Certainly, when you’re starting a company, there are infinite things you could be doing all the time. I think that’s true for most people.
Your family is also a bottomless pit, too. I say that in a loving way, but a bottomless pit of need. So, by definition, you’re never going to get through all this stuff on your to-do list in many areas of your life. As such, you have to change your mindset and decide that you’re going to prioritize putting you and the care of yourself (including, of course, an element of joy or fun!) in there, or it’s not going to happen.
5) For those that are successful at making self-care a priority, what are the long-term benefits? Why is self-care more important than just feeling good in the moment?
Self-care is about maintaining your core capacities. It’s so much deeper than a moment of enjoyment. Don’t think of it like an ice cream cone that was really good for a few minutes, but then it’s over. Self-care is essential for helping you really maximize the moments of success when things are going well. If you’ve taken good care of yourself and are mentally and physically in relatively good shape, you’ll be able to maximize and ride those waves in a great way. On the other side of the coin, if you’re not taking good care of yourself, when the inevitable challenges of life hit, you’re much more likely to sink. You just don’t have the resilience to bounce back when illness, loss, disappointment, pain, and other setbacks come. It’s about optimizing the highs and being able to ride out the lows more successfully.